You are invited: Pity Party chez moi… Or not?
Do you believe that most things in life happen for a reason? Recently, I pondered on the statement ‘everything happens for a reason’ and realise that I don’t truly buy into that. There are things that I question. That I cannot comprehend a reason. Like violence, the tragedies of war, famine, rape, illness and suffering. Some things I think, happen for no rhyme nor reason.
Though, when it comes to our intimate day to day experiences (the above excluded), then I would revert back to my first words, I believe that most things in life happen for a reason. Just as every living creature on this earth has role to play (ok, except for mosquitos. I’m still not sure I buy into the importance of mosquito larvae in aquatic ecology – but that’s a subject for another day); the same would be true of the trials and tribulations which arise in our personal worlds.
If we only had sunshine and no storms, we would have no flowers, no sustenance, no flowing rivers, no skiing. You get my drift…
There was a time in my life, when the voices in my head were on repeat with “Why did this happen? Why me?”. Moments when things felt hard and unfair, resulting in my submergence into ‘pity party favours’ (Nicotine, choclatene, and gin & quinine topping the list). Have you ever been there?
And then? Well and then, thankfully I had the sanity to slap myself around a bit (virtually, that is – this is not a violence piece), put on my big girl panties and forced myself to keep going. To stop playing the victim, and continue playing the leading role in my movie of life.
Once I opened my tear stained eyes and started to pay attention, I realised that I was more savvy. That my experiences, made me wiser, smarter, gentler, harder, evolving as I went along. Because of them, I really do prefer the person that I have become.
When looking in my rear view mirror, I realised that all the things showing up on my richter scale actually pushed a result that I had either never considered or increased my determination towards my envisioned result.
When in a dark place, I banned the “Why me?” from my vocab and replaced it with “Perhaps instead of being buried, you’re being planted Tanya?”
Truth be told? Its worked and is still working for me… I have a looong proof list, which keeps me going.
This is a context that I invite you to choose. This is a context that will serve you far more than the blubbering ‘pity party’. And if you don’t mind, I’ll stick to my first words that I believe that most things in life happen for a reason.
Consider that ‘Pity party’ invitation revoked…
Tanya Long 2018/10/20
Read more at Tanya’s Two Cents Home page