- Tanya Long 2016/11/26
Ever been stuck in a what if Conundrum? Where the thoughts invade your mind to the point that if you were to look at yourself in the mirror, virtual thought bubbles would be popping up creating a dense cloud enveloping your brain?
The other day, I had exactly that. I decided to take the plunge and put my writing out into the world – which up until now I had shared only with a trusted few whom I knew without a doubt would unconditionally offer approval (and yes my dog has earned the status of critic extraordinaire!).
I know that in my writing, my next step for growth is sharing, feedback and debate. I also know that without this I may just stagnate, pick up torrid habits and progress far too slowly. But, as I was about to press send on my keyboard the panic started to rise. Fear officially raised its lizards head on my screen. What if? What if people hate my stuff? What if its no good? What if people laugh? What if you find out you can’t write? What if…. What if … and the cloud started to build. To the stage where the what ifs ceased to make sense and started spawning themselves into incredulously ridonculous baby what ifs. At the point where I got to the “What if the aliens swoop down and abduct me in order to make the earth a safer planet again?” I realised I had to STOP. Ever been there?
Thank goodness with the help of coaching, the one thing that I’ve started to gain is a toolbox of different and useful perspectives.
The reality as I’ve come to know is that when taking a chance or jumping out of your comfort zone, FEAR arrives on your doorstep with its “what if” bag in tow.
I reminded myself that fear has 2 meanings.
Forget Everything and Run
Face Everything and Rise
The Choice is Mine
Mmmm, I also reminded myself that – being FEARLESS does not always mean you are without fear, but rather that you have the courage to move forward inspite of your fear.
So I decided on a 5 step plan:
- Stop, recognise the what ifs for what they represent – fear.
- Make a choice. Choose to be fearless, face it and rise.
- Reframe your what ifs to look for the positives, banish the negatives. (In my case, what if it doesn’t matter? What if there’s huge learning opportunities from this? What if this is my next step to finishing my book? What if my stuff is good enough? What if the aliens employ me to coach their leaders?)
- Take a chance. Be brave.
- Surrender to it.
So, next time you feel a “what if” conundrum looming, try my 5 step plan. It worked for me.. You’re reading this aren’t you? 😉
Much love and light to you
PS… I’m off to pack